Mistakes and Misery
by lordofthepringles
Summary: Luke shows up at Reid's door and throws the fact that he chose Noah in his face. Reid is fed up and put Luke's in his place. One-Shot.


'What are you doing here, Luke?"

"Noah knows about us."

"You told him?"

"No, he got his sight back completely. He saw us kissing. He hates me now and told me he doesn't need or want me, even after I told him I loved him and wanted him back."

"And why are you telling me this?"

"Because I have no one else to talk to..."

"Fuck you, Luke. You think you can just come running to me anytime you have a falling out with Noah? It's pretty damn clear to me that you made your choice and I am not it. What the hell gives you the idea that I would just willingly listen to you bitch about your boyfriend to me? Why is it that for someone who is so concerned about other people's feelings, you care so little about mine? I mean, I fucking pour my heart out to you today, and I tell you about my childhood, and what do you do? You kiss me, then you turn around and throw it all back in my face. So thanks for stringing me along, just so you could go running back to Noah. Now get the hell out of my house."

With that, Reid slammed the door in Luke's face.

_No way in hell, he was letting Luke get close again. What the fuck had he been thinking? _

Reid's hands were shaking and he sat back down on the couch. He stared blankly at the baseball game, not really paying attention, with thoughts running through his mind,

_Did Luke know all along he was going to choose, Noah? What the fuck am I thinking, of course he did. Wow, I was a total moron for ever thinking I had a chance against the epic love that is Noah and Luke._

_If falling in love means getting your feelings completely disregarded and being tossed around like an emotional punching bag, no thanks. I'll stick to one night stands from now on._

So that is what Reid did. Six weeks later, he started casually dating random guys Katie would try to set him up with.

Katie had called him that evening saying she had met this wonderful concert pianist named Mark, and they would hit it off. So Reid got his number and set up a date at the Lakeview.

Reid and Mark walked in and sat down at their table. Mark was very handsome with sandy blonde hair and brilliant blue eyes. He had dimples and a cute spiky haircut. In fact, Mark looked familiar, but he couldn't place it.

They were in the middle of their entree, when he looked up to see Luke staring daggers at him.

_Fuck him, he doesn't get to be mad. He fucked with me and then dropped me to go back to Noah._

Reid kept his face stoic though and simply waved at him and flashed him a sarcastic smile.

Luke looked furious and turned and left the restaurant.

Twenty minutes later, Reid had to use the restroom and excused himself.

He walked into the men's room, when he was suddenly grabbed and thrown against the wall,

"What the hell is your problem, Reid?"

"I don't have any problems, besides you assaulting me, Mr. Snyder. Now please let go of me."

"You are really an asshole. So what? You get angry that I rejected you, so you date my doppelganger? You think that will make it all better?"

"Excuse me? I'm sorry, Luke, but shut the fuck up. Katie set me up with him, because we are both single. So regardless of who I am dating, it's not one damn iota any of your business."

Reid grasped Luke's hands and forcibly pried them off him.

Luke wouldn't budge though and leaned in closer,

"I know it's none of my business, but it pisses me off to see you on a date with someone else."

Luke kissed Reid then and moved himself closer to Reid. Reid could feel his erection pressing into his stomach.

He broke the kiss and pushed Luke away,

"Stop it, Luke. I won't be the other guy. I could fuck you right here and it would probably be the best of your life. But sex isn't enough for me. I wanted all of you and you chose Noah. So guess what, you get to straighten yourself up, go home to your boyfriend and love him, and leave me the hell alone."

With that, Reid washed his hands and left the bathroom. He could see the hurt and tears in Luke's eyes and for one brief moment he wanted to turn back and comfort him. But he couldn't. Not anymore.

Reid went back, ended the date early and went home to bed. He tossed and turned for a few hours. Luke wasn't his problem, so why did his heart break when Luke's face flashed in his head?

Reid went into the living room and got on his laptop. He decided maybe a bit of journal reading would help.

He signed on and within five minutes, he had an IM from Luke.

_Did you fuck him?_

_Does it matter?_

_I saw you leave separately._

_What are you stalking me now?_

_No, just curious._

_Go to bed, Mr. Snyder_

_I couldn't sleep thinking that you two were having sex._

_Goddamnit, Luke. What the hell do you want from me? _

_I want you. _

_Well, you made it painfully obvious that you want Noah more, and I won't be second best or your fuck buddy._

_I broke up with Noah for good. He left today. He decided to go to film school. And I wouldn't leave Oakdale._

_Okay? You think that just makes your behavior of the past few weeks erased and forgiven?_

_No, I just wanted to talk to you._

_Well find a shrink then._

Reid signed off then.

Not even two minutes later, there was a soft knock at the front door.

Reid got up and opened it.

Luke was standing there in jeans and his red hoodie.

"What are you doing here, Luke?"

"For the first time, ever, I can actually answer that. I'm here, because I want to be here. I want to be with you. I have feelings for you. Deep feelings. Ones that I want to explore."

Reid just stood in there doorway staring at Luke.

"Say something, Reid."

"I have nothing to say. This is what I would've paid to hear a few weeks ago. Now, I'm not sure you are what I want."

Luke's face went immediately crestfallen.

"Let me finish, Luke. I wanted you so badly. I poured my heart and soul out to you and I felt in that moment that you and truly connected. I felt that finally someone saw me for who I was and accepted me despite my flaws. But then, you immediately turned around and chose Noah. I felt like I wasn't good enough, that my love, what I had to offer, who I was wasn't good enough. I never stopped caring about you, Luke or wanting you. But I can't be someone's doormat anymore. I can't be the guy who you run to when things go bad with Noah. I won't be. I deserve to be loved in return just as much as I love you. "

Luke looked up then with crocodile tears in his eyes,

"You love me?"

"I've loved you since you told me you cared in Dallas."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because you made it painfully obvious you still loved Noah, and that I was great and all, but not the one."

"I was such a fool, Reid."

"I think present tense is fitting, here, Luke."

Luke laughed at that and punched Reid in the arm.

"Okay. I'm still a fool. I was so damn scared. That day I was feeling things I had never felt before. Not even with Noah. I couldn't express it to myself let alone anyone else. So I took the safe route. I went back to what I knew and in the process, I lost out on you. I wish everyday that I could go back to that day and tell Noah, what I was feeling. That I had moved on, and that I was falling hard, and I wish that I hadn't shown up at your door and thrown him in your face. I wish that I had the courage then to tell you to your face, that I had feelings for you and that it scared me, but I was willing to take a chance. Instead, I didn't and Noah and I suffered through weeks of misery. And when we finally realized that it was a mistake, you had started dating again."

Reid looked at Luke who was babbling on,

"Why do you think I went on dates, Luke?"

"Because you were over me."

"No, because I wasn't over you. I needed something to distract me, while I pined and grieved the fact that we weren't meant to be and that you didn't love me at all, even though I was helplessly in love with you."

"I did love you, Reid. I just couldn't admit it to myself or anyone else. I felt like if I said that I loved you, it would negate everything Noah and I ever shared. And instead of talking through it with you, I ran. I do love you Reid. You are the man I'm in love with."

Reid stepped forward and pulled Luke inside and shut the door.

"Thank you for saying this to me, even if it is a few weeks to late. I should probably get rid of Mark, since you'll be wanting the bed I assume."

Luke acted offended, but he grabbed Reid's hand as he led them to the bedroom.

The rest of the night and their lives, Reid showed Luke what he had been missing out on and Luke finally had his proof that Reid really was gay and loved playing with his toy.


End file.
